Friday, January 27, 2012

NUMBERS

Well, this birthday came and went.  And it was better than the one I had when I was 21.  We had a blizzard in northern KY that day and everything was shut down for days.  So no party, no get-together with family, no cake, no ice cream, no nothing on that day.  And at 21 I really felt like the day should be celebrated ON THE DAY - or it was ruined.  Oh, yes, even at 21 I was a pessimist.

And today, I'm thinking about numbers.  Just a number, this birthday, marking the number of years I have been earthbound.  What do I have to show for these years?  What do I need to show?  What kind of mark will I make on the lives who come into contact with me?  Will they remember?  Will something I said make them smile - or make them frown and walk away? 

Was I kind to you when I came into your life, or was I unkind?  If each day is an opportunity for growth and exploration, then is that exploration the whole purpose - is the journey the thing, not the destination?

Numbers.  Just numbers. 
I lost a blogger a few months ago who was also a teacher at one time.  Because of that my stat numbers have gone down.  I don't know why she dropped me, but it has affected the numbers on my blog.  Interesting how one person can affect you that way, good or bad. 

Numbers.  Are you a better person because 50 people come to your birthday party instead of 5?  What chemical reactions in my brain today are causing me to ponder these things?  Perhaps my serotonin and dopamine levels are low and I need to stop thinking and just get into the art room and raise them by creating something almost beautiful (remember, yesterday's lesson was wabi sabi).




We're all just interconnected numbers;
some are pluses in your life and some are minuses. 
I hope the pluses outnumber the minuses, whether the numbers are large or small.


Now, for me, I'm going to go take a long walk in the woods...


Have a good weekend, my artsy blogging friends.

24 comments:

Tina Besecker Marohn said...

Enjoy your walk. I'd take that walk with you if I wasn't way out here in the Northwest. I too have a birthday coming up - those mid life number kinds. Trying not to think about it....

Lisa Le Quelenec said...

Big or small, the numbers don't matter. They're just 'numbers' I am just 1 of the ones that your posts touch here in the UK and I know there are many others. One tree is just as beautiful as a whole forest, something to ponder on your walk? Take care my friend, I'll be thinking of you.

Carol Blackburn said...

Mornin, Rhonda. Great post. Thinking about numbers...how about sending me some winning lottery numbers. We have always instilled an interest in math in our grandchildren by making them realize that everything is numbers. From who you are (your social security number or mark of the beast?), from who you need to speak to (your address or phone number, or email/blog/website), to what you need to eat (recipe ingredients) and so on and so forth. It has worked and seems to have made life easier for them.
Speaking of numbers, just how many steps did you walk?

Vicki Holdwick said...

Happy Birthday, Rhonda,

Until I retired, I was a high school math teacher where I taught Algebra and AP Calculus. Numbers are definitely a part of my life.

xoxo

Mick Carney said...

We all go through those periods where we question all sorts of aspect of our life. Ultimately we should step back and examine the balance sheet of our existence. At the end of that process we should look at the negatives and go out and do something about those things over which we have a degree of control.

It seems to me that you have much to be proud about and also thankful for, someone who touches the lives of many others and that is to be admired. Hope you get back from the walk with a more optimistic perspective.

hw (hallie) farber said...

I enjoy numerology--hope this is a good year for you. I'll be hitting a BIG number in a couple of months; I won't let it bug me.

Pam Johnson Brickell said...

I think we with January birthdays get hit with new year thoughts along with birthday ponderings. I hope you enjoyed your walk in the woods. In the land of numbers I count the blessing of you in my life very high :)

Here's a chuckle for you. It's 6:15 pm and I'm stealing moments for me to catch up with my friends... The work verification that's starring at me while I write this is 'supper' - hmmm, stand in line google, my honey and dogs are already in charge of keeping tabs on me when it's the dinner hour!

Christiane Kingsley said...

When I read your blog, the pluses always outnumber the minuses. Happy belated birthday, dear Rohonda.

RH Carpenter said...

Well, I took a nice long drive and then a walk and will take another walk tomorrow - nature cleanses the soul of the weary traveler :) Thanks, everyone, for your comments on this post - and thanks so much to those who say I am a plus in their blogging lives! I am happy to hear that.
Now, Pam, I hope you obeyed blogger and had some supper!! ha ha

CrimsonLeaves said...

My whole life I've been told I'm a pessismist or very negative. I hate being called that but it comes through living with a negative and critical mom, I guess. I keep working on it though, trying to get away from it and couching it in humor when I cannot. I find introspection to always be a negative thing for me.

As to blog stats? Who cares? I do my blog for me, a way to put down thoughts, maybe interact with blogging friends, none of whom might like me in real life. But the interaction is all gravy for me. In fact, I had zero comments on my last post!! Course that could be 'cause I closed the other blog and opened anew back on blogspot. LOL

Happy birthday, dear Rhonda.

Kevin Neal said...

I sometimes worry that I will get too many blogs on my list to follow regularly. It might be blog overload. Or it might be that there is blog overlap, for example... I actually follow a lot of blogs that you do, but I don't necessarily join as a follower because I come to your blog to see them. Kind of like a home page for specific blogs if that makes sense. And I think what it comes down to is what that person is looking to get out of the blog. For me, if I'm not learning something on a regular basis, I might drop a blog, although the only ones I have dropped are the ones that have too few posts to keep me interested as opposed to the actual content. Just some random thoughts of mine.

Michelle Himes said...

Happy Birthday, a day late. I've gotten to the age where the numbers just don't make sense anymore. I shake my head in disbelief at them occasionally, but most of the time I ignore them because they are not "me".

I still remember the quilt SWAP painting that you sent me that you called "Older is Better". It happened to come on my birthday, not one of my better birthdays, and it cheered me up.

RH Carpenter said...

Sherry, I think no one is totally one or the other - we have optomistic and pessimistic days - and I'm reading a little about neurobiology right now and our brains are programmed to see and look out for the bad stuff (that doesn't serve us as well now as it did when we were living in caves and chasing big animals)!

Kevin, I know what you mean - I think I often get overloaded and can't catch up with many blogs I really like - I try to visit my dozen or so favorites often, though.

Michelle, I remember that painting! Oh, I wonder what it looks like now - it was one of my first ones and I think I'd do it better now :) But I am glad it lifted your spirits on that birthday - I love things like that!

Linda Young said...

Happy Birthday Rhonda. ... a few days late; but best wishes regardless!

Maggie Latham said...

Interesting post, Rhonda. Here’s my take…. Re: Party numbers…if you invite more people more people would come...but who cares! It’s better to be surrounded by two good friends than a roomful of strangers claiming to be friends. Re: Blog numbers… if you write from your heart and share your work, what does it matter if your numbers ebb and flow? If you are only getting traffic because of someone else’s subscription…then it’s not the right kind of traffic. Re: Age…. you are as young as you feel in your minds eye. Re: What do I show for my years…just keep being you, the best person you can be, kind, considerate and pray (if that’s something you do) for a quiet mind and inner peace. ....I do this even when I think I am quite peaceful!
You never really know how one word, one smile or one spoken thought will affect the lives of others…especially on an Internet format. Your words and posts often make me think and re-evaluate what’s going on in my own head….and that’s not numbers….just an Internet connection and your inspiring words and paintings. (lol). I hope your walk was serene…. give yourself a hug from me for your birthday, birthday girl.

RH Carpenter said...

What a kind and thoughful post, Maggie. Thanks so much!

RH Carpenter said...

Thanks, Linda :)

debwardart said...

Dear Rhonda,I think you get too introspective sometimes. I agree with every word Maggie Latham said - don't worry about age, numbers, what others think of you - I know you are a good, funny, goofy, quirky gal - and that's all that matters! So there!

http://carolking.wordpress.com said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RHONDA! (Sorry I'm a day late)

Today (Jan. 27th was my nephew's 21st birthday.)

I too had a bit of a spell pondering on my birthday that passed in December.

Even if the number is getting bigger, you know what they say...the more birthdays you have the longer you live. So enjoy!

Beautiful sunny flowers.

RH Carpenter said...

Thanks, Deb :) You know, we have so many positives in our lives and yet we still dwell on the negatives - this human brain is a strange thing. Perhaps if we had to fight to live (like many wild animals), we wouldn't have time to worry about anything!!

Thanks, Carol :) Certain numbers do make you ponder - they seem like milestones, in a way: 13,
21, 30, 35, 40, 50, etc...

RH Carpenter said...

Carol B., you asked me how many steps I walked? I don't know because I just have a heart monitor/watch that calculates my heart rate and then the calories burned but it doesn't have a pedometer - but I can tell you that, in one day (from 9:30 am when I put the watch on until 5:30 pm when I stopped moving much for the day, I expended 2,550 calories and that seems like a lot?)

Irina said...

When I met my 40th birthday, I suddenly realized that I will not live forever. It was heavy discovery, which lead to depression and looking for the sense of my life. As no sense was found, I decided to enjoy "now", neither past, nor future. The idea calmed me down and oxygen returned)).
Wish you happy "Now".
Numbers.

Caroline said...

Oh Rhonda I arrived too late for your birthday tea with all your blogger friends. Many belated birthday wishes to you. I hope you had a lovely day.

RH Carpenter said...

Irina, living in the now is the very best thing we can do for ourselves - good for you, realizing it when you were half-way through life :)

Caroline, thanks so much!